I went on leave at week 35. I know there are many women who go out on leave much earlier so I didn't have it that bad. The first two days were nice. I slept in, watched Price is Right, caught up on social media, organized boards on Pinterest and took a nap. I made a to-do list and took care of maternity leave paperwork and applying for state disability. By day three over half of my list was complete and I was bored out of my mind. Daytime TV is awful, you can only read so much (5 books read while on leave) and social media gets incredibly boring when you check it every 5 minutes.
I kept myself busy with some projects. I started baby girl's scrapbook and baby book. I organized all of our pictures from random albums and piles into matching albums. I became an expert Etsy shopper.
So many people told me things that a woman on rest should never hear.
"I wish I could get a vacation." - Rest is not a vacation. Pregnant women on bed rest / modified rest are not going to some tropical island to sip fruity drinks. We are stuck in bed or at home with limited activities and entertainment options.
"Enjoy rest while you have it because once the baby arrives you won't get rest." - Women who are put on rest have something wrong with their pregnancy or baby. I never heard of a woman going on rest at week 34 because everything is going just great! Yeah, we might be napping and sleeping but we are also worrying a ton. I would much rather be exhausted from working during my third trimester than having a baby with a known birth defect.
"I'm jealous. I wish I could go on leave from work." - Again, this is not a vacation people! Plus, women on leave typically loose income. Yes, we can get state DI but it's not always 100% of out income.
I'm a big believer that everything happens for a reason. Because I was forced to rest and slow down I was able to reflect on my pregnancy. I discovered three things I loved about being pregnant.
The first is that my husband and I became so much closer during my pregnancy and especially during leave. He was my rock when we got our diagnosis at week 33. My husband was so strong for me when we heard the news about our baby girl. I am such an independent woman and perhaps a bit stubborn. During leave I was forced to rely on my husband. He took on so much to make my leave as comfortable as possible. This experience made me fall in love with my husband all over again. I am so appreciative and grateful to have an incredible partner.
The second thing I loved about being pregnant was feeling my baby girl move. When I stopped working I felt her more. Those little rolls and jabs kept me motivated when I felt big as a house and incredibly uncomfortable. I got to experience something with my baby that no one else could.
The third thing I loved about being pregnant was all of the attention. People are super nice to pregnant women. Because of the duodenal atresia and extra amniotic fluid I was carrying bigger than normal. At 33 weeks I was carrying as if I was full-term. I got a lot of attention for several weeks.
I tried to stay as positive as I could during leave. I believed that my baby could sense what I was feeling. I needed to keep her inside for as along as possible and I tried to make the best of rest.
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